When I was pregnant with my first child, I was an overconfident mom-to-be. I had a vision of how motherhood would look and feel that included eternally happy babies who didn’t cry or complain too much. In my visions of motherhood, my children slept through the night fairly quickly after birth. I didn’t have anyone close to me who had children, so I wasn’t privy to the details of caring for a child day in and day out.
It came as quite a shock when I became a mom for the first time. Big news flash to me: motherhood was the hardest thing I have ever done. It was humbling. I vividly remember driving home from the hospital with my new baby in her car seat, wondering how I would survive taking care of this child every day . . . forever (because parenthood never ends, no matter how old your child is).
I recently read a new book called Lose The Cape, Realities From Busy Moms and Strategies To Survive, which keeps motherhood in perspective. When I was a new mom, I certainly would’ve benefited from a no-nonsense, informative book like Lose The Cape. In the book, authors Alexa Bigwarfe and Kerry Rivera are killing off the image of “supermom” and recognizing we are all doing what’s best for us, our kids, our families.
There are so many great nuggets of practical advice and tips for moms, such as:
- Nurturing your marriage after kids
- Navigating friendships and finding your support group
- Slowing down and enjoying the bedtime routine to avoid power struggles
- Put down electronics once in awhile and enjoy the moment
- Managing a family calendar
- Meal planning
- Not letting Pinterest make you feel like a failure
I found this tip in the book a great insight, and it brought back memories of when my triplets were infants:
Tip #3: Give each other breaks. Tag in. Tag out. Spouses typically know when their partner is hitting a breaking point. Voices are raised. Patience is gone. Crazy cleaning sprees ensue. Orders are barked. This is usually when it’s time for a spouse to tag out. For Kerry, that means getting out, going for a run, locking herself in a room with a book or magazine, or heading to the store to cruise the grocery aisles in peace.
When our triplets were infants and our days revolved around feeding and sleep schedules, my husband and I used to give each other one two-hour break each weekend. We were allowed to go somewhere without any children to do whatever we wanted with our brief freedom. Sometimes I would just go down the street to Starbucks and write my blog or read a book. Giving each other breaks provided that little refresher we needed to carry on.
Reading Lose The Cape was a beautiful reminder that motherhood is hard and we are all doing the best we can. It is filled with useful advice about how we can be successful and happy mothers without the unrealistic superwoman expectation.
We don’t need to make everything we pin on Pinterest or spend every waking moment doing everything for our children to be good moms. We are good moms because every day we love our children and do our best . . . and that is enough.
Buy a copy of the book on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Lose-Cape-Realities-Strategies-Survive-ebook/dp/B00UWCLY9M.
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Disclaimer: I received an advanced PDF copy of Lose The Cape in exchange for this review. All the thoughts and opinions in this article are my own.
Until next time, the mothership is signing off.